One word. Many encourage people to determine their one word for the year. Here is a process to determine your one word: https://mountainmodernlife.com/word-of-the-year/.
You may have already done this. More than a few will testify selecting your one word will change your life.
If you have yet to identify your one word might I suggest the word NO! That’s right, NO! It can be the ‘No you in the New Year.’
There is an epidemic of people saying yes. You may be impacted by this epidemic. You say yes to way too many things. Someone asks if you can help on a project and you say “yes.” You are asked to attend an event. “Yes.” You are asked to take on more responsibility. “Yes.”
We tend to say yes, much more than no. Yes is viewed as positive. Yes is seen as the helpful response. Yes is our bent toward wanting to please others. Yes is a means of showing we are all in. The truth is, we say yes, because it is easier than saying no. In many cases no is the better response.
In the Bible there is a book in the New Testament. It is titled after its author James. The book of James has been called ‘Faith in Blue jeans.’ This moniker has been attached due to the practical faith it lays out. In his book James says, “Just say a simple yes or no” (James 5:12). Sound advice. The problem? Saying no is seldom simple.
In this beginning of 2023 I’d like to suggest you make ‘no’ your one word. Or, at least, a key part of your vocabulary. Here is a suggested list of what to say no to.
No to the things that distract you from your mission
No to those who don’t have your best interest in mind
No to anything that dilutes your priority
No to engaging in unhelpful rhetoric
No to stupidity
No to anyone, or anything, that wants your attention at your peril
Here is the challenge. When you say no, people will attempt to make you feel guilty. They will want you to think you let them down. They actually have good intentions, and want your yes, but that is not a compelling reason to provide it to them.
When someone wants your yes, use these filter questions:
How will my yes contribute to my priorities?
What will I have to give up to say yes?
How will my yes benefit them?
How will my yes impact my time?
How will my yes stunt their growth?
Make NO part of your language this year. Remember many opportunities are simply distractions. If you know how to say no, you will also know when it is best to say yes. Happy No Year!